It’s the Second and Your ‘G’ Dang Tovascopes Are Ready!

WOW!!!! It’s finally August, which oddly feels like summer will soon be coming to an end. Isn’t that sad? I know for me personally, summer has been something that I’ve longed for while walking around cold San Francisco, but ever since we moved to Austin, I’ve absolutely loathed summer. It’s hot. It’s humid. AND I HAVE NOTHING TO WEAR. My new hashtag will be #hatehumidityloveeverythingelse.

Whatdya think?

If you don’t know me at all, one of the first questions I usually ask people is what their zodiac sign is? Although I have NEVER used this as a pickup line, I have used it as a way to generally get a vague broad-stroke painting of a personality and have used it to be mindful of cliche tropes of each sign. For example, when meeting a Cancer, I know that for the most part, I need to be more careful with my words, as my blunt Sagittarian ways can erk them. Part of this also comes from having one too many interactions with a Cancer and thus having to apologize for offending them. Every. Damn. Time.

As far as horoscopes go, and using astrology to interpret aspects of your day to day or monthly forecast, I take all of that with a small grain of salt. For me, it’s more of a fun way of pretending to be a weatherman and thankfully to the well-oiled machine Astrostyle, this whole process is that much easier. As always, all credit for these interpretations is due to the hard work, dedication, and magical ways of The Astrotwins Tali and Ophira Edut, who are professional astrologers and authors.

Fair warning, like almost all weatherman, my predictions may be off, my interpretations could potentially be wrong, and I might lead you off a cliff, BUT it could be fun, and if you want the full version filled with accuracy, planetary alignments, and whatnot, visit the Astrotwins on



Calling all Leo’s!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Happy Birthday! Extra exclamation points and all. We’re well into Leo season, but as it turns out, we won’t be in full swing until the 11th with a solar eclipse in Leo. So just think, the best is yet to come—as well as the potential to push you right into your true path. Now doesn’t that sound exciting?

Did you know that Mercury is in retrograde in your sign until the 19th of August? If you didn’t that might be some helpful information as any form of communication could be leaving you feeling misunderstood, misrepresented, and misinterpreted. Maybe consider taking a step back from putting yourself out there on social media and take a mental vacay. Tune out, and consider doing a blackout month on forms of social media and technology as this retrograde can cause you to muck things up.

This step back could also be the perfect time to start working on some of those lofty goals that you have pushed to the side, consider using this to your advantage and lean into the drawing board a little more than usual. Retrogrades are sort of a weird tool at reconnecting us with the past and reminding us of things that we lost, so maybe use this planetary clusterfuck to reallocate some attention to plans that you’ve lost or put on the backburner.

Don’t worry, Leo season isn’t all hum-drum, in fact, by the 25th a Virgo sun will emerge from the ashes and allow you to finally get the recognition you deserve. See? See? I told you it’s not all boring stuff. Along with the ending of a retrograde, you also are going to kickstart some great habits. Consider trying out new morning routines, exercises, and healthy eating habits. Have you considered trying out meditation? Now might be the perfect time to start looking into it.



Oh, Virgo, there is something so wonderful about the moment before it’s your turn to step into the light. It’s like prepping before a big show and putting in all this hard work and then the day before completely tuning everyone out and pampering yourself before your performance? That’s basically how your feeling right now in Leo season, and while that might be difficult for your usually motivated self, lean into it rather than fight against it. At least that’s what the Astrotwins recommend.

As everyone is in retrograde until the 19th, you might want to consider taking a step back and leaning into that intuitive aspect of your personality—maybe even consider spirituality? This aspect could help you muster up an ounce of clarity in order to provide you with the right tools for communication for the next season.

Crack out the tarot cards, talk with a medium, and go to church. All at once. Or, take some time to start studying up on the things that you’ve put on hold. Anything that will be remotely reflective will be helpful for the next month and actually well into the next year.



As stale as it may sound, you are the BEST at making friends. Like. Literally. How do you even? Luckily, August is the perfect month for you to take a step back, relax, and reconnect with your favorite friends, and their friends, and their friends, and their friend’s friends. Group activities are going to be buzzing around you and Libra you’re at the center of them all. You may even meet someone who is sort of a kindred spirit in ways allowing you to awaken the inner social justice warrior within you.

Now is the time for the true-blue people that enthusiastically, genuinely, and whole-heartedly adore team Libra. Luckily, you might even meet some new members to add to the club, especially on the 11th, and while all the signs are coping with a communicative retrograde, you shouldn’t be too phased as you typically think before you speak. Just make sure to keep that in mind before you jump into things fully.

If you are coupled up, relationships could hit some tension as an unexpected attraction might catch you off guard. Consider treading with caution and remember that during this time the lines between love and hate might become razor thin.



Ambition is your mantra this month you little strange arachnid you. This isn’t anything new for your sign, as typically you lend yourself to being an extremely hard working ambitious person. Luckily, Leo season is allowing you to ignore the drama, haters, and fake friends and remind you what it means to be a #boss.

While communication takes a backburner for everyone due to the retrograde in Leo, it might also throw you a few curveballs that throw off your well-crafted agenda. Sound like trouble? Potentially. BUT instead of allowing it to throw you off, roll with it and relax. Everyone needs to take a g-dang chill pill this month and go with the flow, that goes for you too BB. Your sign isn’t so prone to being flexible, despite your element being water, so take some advice from me, and calm the ‘f’ down. Consider doing a detox even, or look into a meditation practice like TM.

One of the things that challenged you over the summer was your personal relationships, and those could come under testing once more during the 7th. Just remember to calm down, think before you speak, and consider listening to the full story before you make any assumptions. Intuition comes naturally to you Scorpio, but don’t allow it to make any harsh judgments before you hear the truth. By the end of the month, things could settle down a bit as the retrograde ends and a potential for a budding romance.



Remember when the equestrian gods shined down on every Sagittarius in the world and blessed us with a performance by two Sagittarian Queens Nicki Minaj and Taylor Swift at the VMA’s? Taylor walked to Nicki and Nicki looked at Taylor, and the two of them shined and strutted their stuff? Well, now is the time to go big or go home just like them. That’s right Sag, the possibilities are endless. Travel. Business. Love. Everything has potential this month and after taking a somewhat low-key July, you’re ready to burst into the social scene and share your grand visions with the world.

However, as I’ve been telling every one of your zodiac pals, Mercury is in retrograde in Leo until the 19th making communication a serious problem—while normally this is no problem for you, now more than ever, pitching your wild idea might miss the mark. Hold off on making any grandiose statements or clever comments that might put you in a situation to offend someone or cause a major PR debacle. Along with that fair warning, just make sure to have all your ducks in a row before you do anything major.

On the 25th the Virgo sun forms a rare grand alignment with Saturn and Uranus helping you out financially. You could swiftly rise through the social ranks without having to sell out, making that grand idea that you had earlier come to fruition. Remember, it’s all about who you know, how you make connections, and with a little dash of luck, you could be illuminating your future for the better in a major way.



Oh, Capricorn, I have an inexplicable soft spot for your freakish two-horned fishtailed sign, and this month you might be going through things a little tumultuous. So here’s what a Sagittarius (me) is going to tell you, I love you with all my heart, and that should feel like a giant hug from the sun, or at least a half man half horse thing.

Stay centered this month and try to remember that your energy could be taking some serious plunges this month. The sun takes a nose dive into Leo and your eighth house of intimacy which might make you crave some deep one-on-one encounters in order to allow you to feel more calm and centered. This month, more than ever you could be soaking up everyone’s energy leaving you feeling drained and somewhat craving lighthearted small talk.

At the same time, everyone is going through a retrograde so it might make communication not so easy, in which case, you could be craving some physical stimulation. Wink. Wink. By the 19th things will change and as if a fog has lifted you might be ready to nosedive into huge financial gains. Like for example, a serious long-term property or renovation on a current one, or potentially a business venture that launches you into a better and brighter future—either way, just remember to be open and vulnerable and I’ll be there with a bouquet of flowers and a hug!




And I mean that in all sincerity. It really has been your season, and luckily as we enter into August, you are going to get the much-needed break you deserve. However, there is also a major eclipse happening that is going to give you the energy to start a passion project.

BUT, and that’s capital b.u.t. it will leave you feeling wired and tired.

Regardless it will also be exceedingly fruitful. Wait! Isn’t this how you like things to go? On again, off again? In one moment you are wanting to conserve energy and preserve your time for the things that matter, on the other hand, you are restless and ready to jump into things.

If I could give you any advice, I would say to just remember that every season changes and this one will be gone soon enough. Take the time to harness your energy and allocate it accordingly. And don’t worry, by the end of the month you will have all your ducks in a row, and your financial stresses will be put at ease.



Typically you have an uncanny ability to juggle a lot of things at once. This month starts off no different from your usual routine of balancing life, however, this time, it seems like you have found a solid way to organize your life and bring structure to the things that matter most to you. Isn’t that refreshing Pisces? It should be.

Regardless of the effortlessness in your house of structure and security this month, you might be feeling like you are swimming upstream. With everyone feeling the effects of the sun in retrograde until the nineteenth you, unfortunately, aren’t entirely unable to swim under the radar. On the 11th you will get a jolt of electric energy emotionally and this boost will help you focus on the friends and family members that are nearest and dearest.

However, mind your manners and if you’ve got a juicy secret to spill, maybe hold off until your message will be received easier.

If you’ve been feeling a little overwhelmed, maybe take some time for some personal care. I’ve heard you’re quite intuitive, so anything esoteric or magical in its approach might be right up your alley Sweets.



Hey lover!!!! I loooooove when you are center stage! I’m not sure why but seeing you shine just makes me so happy! Maybe that’s because I have so many Aries friends in my life. Maybe it’s because I feel for my soul fire sister/mister. I just came up with that, do you love it?

You know those t-shirts that came out after Miley Cyrus, came out with that song We Can’t Stop? Well, this month you can’t stop, won’t stop. You are in your element henny and it is time to shine! If only you had this level of exuberance when it was your birthday.

On the 11th you could be feeling some strong new romantic vibes coming your way, and this could be just the type of plot twist to thrust you into the future. That’s right, this sort of weird planetary clusterfuck that is happening this month along with a major solar eclipse is causing a lot of change for you personally. No worries, you can handle it, just roll with the punches, remain cool and level-headed, and don’t get too preachy. Your verbal approach could be poorly received due to a major retrograde affecting everyone’s communication skills. I know.

Real bummer.



You have gone through some major changes the past couple of months BB, but as it turns out they have been for the better. If your love life has taken a back burner, it could be center stage at the start of this month. This could mean potential marriage proposals, or simply telling your signif you love them. Either way, it could mean some major changes for sure. This also might take some forms stylistically and personally. Have you been eyeing someone’s wardrobe a little too much, maybe its time to explore your creative side stylistically and reinvent yourself in a new way?

I know—I know, that might sound major to you, but trust a Sagittarian friend (me) that this will definitely be for the better. You are going to love the newfound confidence and creativity that feeds your soul. This month is all about treading different paths and no longer returning to the same shit that you’ve done before. This could be somewhat difficult for you but you MUST LEAN IN. Ooh, maybe you should read that book by that one lady who works at Facebook. That could be major for you babe.

When the sun starts leaving Leo and entering into Virgo at the end of the month you are going to be feeling a lot less overwhelmed by all of the changes you’ve made and more in tune with your self. Phweew. Oh, hey, BTW, you could meet some cool new friends after all those changes you’ve made, so enjoy it.



You always get a crazy reputation Sweets, and honestly, I know why, but at the same time, that’s exactly why I love you! Summer has been a little crazy for you personally. There has been a lot of change, a lot of growth, and a shit-ton of challenges, and now finally you are feeling like you are ready to enjoy yourself. This could take new forms like redecorating your home, trying new classes, or hanging out with people at casa Gemini for some game night and binge-watching Netflix.

You could also feel supercharged on your personal goals and aspirations. This could look like mentally stimulating yourself by reading more, researching more, and long dream-like conversations with friends. And luckily for you, the communication retrograde that is affecting literally everyone is not necessarily affecting your communicative sign. You will be able to navigate the misunderstandings quite effortlessly, just remember that this is the case for everyone else.

Get the picture?

Travel-wise you might be a little thrown off by your new digs. Maybe its culturally, maybe its the weather, maybe it’s the fact that this is how the retrograde is affecting you, either way, take it easy on the wanderlust. If you can’t help yourself plan thoroughly. We can’t have you stuck at the airport with a lost passport and no way to get back into the country. Has this happened to you before hun?



If you have been feeling like you are all over your shit then that is probably true. YASSSS HENNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sorry for all the exclamation points Cancer, I’m just so excited for you because last month was your birthday month and you got so much of your shit together that you are launching into August like a bat out of hell—but in a good way.

All of last month you were establishing your plan, making goals and organizing your life to help out with your future projects in a major way, and now thank goddess is the time to reap the rewards of your hard work. I’m sort of vibing on the potential to land a serious new job offer or some much-needed financial security that will establish some peace of mind at chez Cancer.

While those financial situations are excellent, your relationships could take a toll. Fluctuations and sudden changes might become more of the norm this month as everyone is facing a major communication retrograde. Watch what you say, watch how you react, and listen carefully. Friends that once seemed true blue might be more of a dingy gray. Maybe it’s time to cut the chords, maybe it’s time to have a sit-down conversation?

Better yet, forget the conversation and avoid until the 23rd when things shift into Virgo. That will allow you to be more clear and effective with your words. Don’t worry hun, everyone needs a little shift every now and then.

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